I’m such a silly billy, I drive myself insane

I’m too polite for toffee, it’s imprinted in my brain

Politeness was drummed into me from quite an early age

Bad table manners frequently drove dad into a rage

 

We were taught to show respect, be patient – join the queue

But I’m beginning to suspect good manners hamper you

Basic common courtesy is a habit hard to break

I say please and thank you to Alexa for goodness sake

 

Do good manners have a value in today’s society?

To be honest, I’m not sure they do, there’s scant civility

People push and shove you, rush by without a thought

No holding doors, just barge right through, good manners count for nought

 

No-one says they’re sorry, they just look the other way

They’ll mow you down indifferently, don’t care if you’re okay

Not me, I’m quite the opposite, I must make people laugh

If I hold the door for others, they treat me like I’m staff

 

I end up feeling stupid, do my manners have no place?

Next time I’ll leave the door, let it slam in someone’s face

But I don’t want to live like that, there wouldn’t be much joy

If you can’t be considerate among the hoi polloi

 

On reflection, I do worry though, where will it all end?

I hate to think that manners have become a dying trend

But I do feel like a proper chump, I apologise too freely

Why did I say “sorry” to you, when you bumped into me??!