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Press Play to hear me redAnita Brooke
00:00 / 01:23

Boring Farts
 
I find as I’m getting older I get less tolerant
I don’t want to be with people who are dull or ignorant
I like to have a good time, I want to laugh and joke
Have light-hearted conversations without worrying about woke
 
Some people are so touchy and quick to take offence
They’re so opinionated but devoid of common sense
They tell you facts and figures from Wikipedia
They witter on for hours with their verbal diarrhoea
 
They never stop to ask if you’ve opinions of your own
And when you try to contribute they’re looking at their phone
I’m too polite to point this out, I smile and nod my head
I’m bored to tears and haven’t heard a single word they’ve said
 
That’s why I don’t go out much, boring farts are everywhere
They trap you in a corner and blow you with hot air
They take themselves so seriously, they think they know it all
They think they’re oh so clever but they drive me up the wall
 
Where’s their sense of humour? Where’s their sense of fun?
They wouldn't get a joke if it bit them on the bum!
Their skin must be so thick, I’d love to tell them so
If you were one of them, do you think you'd want to know?
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